Sunday, March 3, 2013

He has walked out on me whilst I'm pregnant | IslamicAnswers.com ...

thorn blood 1 %photo

As salam alay kum dear brothers and sisters.

In June last year I got myself involved in a relationship with a married man of 5 children. ?This man was someone I had known since a very tender age of 14 and at the time he was 17. ?I got to know him through family and we became good friends. ?He had always liked me however I was very young and naive and was completely oblivious to how he felt towards me. A year later he was flown over to Pakistan and was pressured into getting married. Despite it being against his wishes, due to extreme family pressure he consented to marriage. ?He arrived back to England a few years later. ?By this time I started college. ?As he discovered this he too registered into college and managed to enrol onto the same course as me. ?Our friendship continued for a few years before I left for university. ?During this period I started to grow a liking for him, however I controlled myself knowing he was married. ?When I left college to go to university, I moved away from home and left behind everything to enjoy university and to make new friends. ?I briefly kept in touch with this man and he made a few visits to see me just as a friend but not long after we lost touch.

There was a big gap of 13 years where we both carried on with our lives separately. ?I focused on my career and my life in general and ?remained single. ?He ?too carried on with his life, his marriage, well so I believed. ?As time went on, ?I ?often heard my parents speak about his family. ?Unfortunately both his parents passed away during these years and I had heard his life took a turning for the worst after their deaths. ?He suffered from severe depression for many years. ?He had never been happy in his marriage anyway but after his parents had died he became extremely bitter towards his wife however remained married to her. They had 5 children together.

Just last year our paths happened to cross again during a charity event that I was involved in. It brought back memories. ?We exchanged numbers and started meeting each other. ?He shared everything about his personal life, his marriage, his children with me. ?I found out how sad his life was... his marriage wasn't like a marriage - just two people sharing the same roof while living two separate lives, with little or no compassion, just constant bickering and arguing. ?He claimed that even though they had made 5 children together they had no feelings towards each other. She was soon to be separated from him as she was in the process of leaving the family home. ?We became very close and soon started a physical relationship. ?He claimed he had loved me since I was a little girl but couldn't pursue me because of what his parents forced him into and that now I had come back into his life he wasn't going to let me go. ?I fell for it..........

A few months went by into our relationship and his wife left the family home and took the children with her. ?I started visiting his family home and we pursued a very intimate relationship. ?During this time I fell pregnant. ?He promised he would get ?a divorce and speak to my parents for marriage before I started showing. ?I waited and waited but nothing happened. ?His lack of effort in sorting out this mess left me with no option but to have an abortion. ?I had such strong feelings for him that I couldn't let him go and just wanted to be married to him. At this point I should have seen the tell tale signs, but my heart controlled my mind and I carried on with this relationship. ?The whole marriage situation, his lazy attitude towards sorting out his divorce put a big strain on our relationship therefore we constantly argued. ?And as time went on he put his family home up for rent and started sleeping at a friends house until he got a smaller place of his own. ?He convinced me to move out with him. ?I fell for it and ended up renting a 1 bed apartment. ?The lease was taken out under my name. ?I continued to push him to sort the divorce so that we could make our relationship halal. ?He reassured me he would and that I just had to be patient. ?Unfortunately I fell pregnant again and this had a big impact on my mood. ?My hormones went everywhere. ?Often leading to more bickering and arguing again mainly about his lack of effort in sorting out his divorce.

Just two days ago he dropped a bombshell on me by saying he couldn't do this anymore and that as much as he loved me he couldn't carry on living with me. ?I was shocked by his decision. ?I trusted this man with my life. ?I left my family home to put a roof over his head, have the lease signed under my name which he has left for me to deal with, and on top of that he has walked out on me whilst I'm pregnant with his child. ?I am left anxious and extremely depressed. ?I have absolutely no one to turn to as I left my family home to live with him. ?I really don't want to abort this child but I'm totally confused as to what will happen if I kept it and had no support from the father. ?I seriously do think he has moved back with his wife to be with his children, but where does this leave me? ?Please can someone help me and recommend a solution to this problem which has potentially destroyed my life. I put my faith and trust into this man and gave my everything to help him only for him to do this to me. ?Please help me find a solution to this problem as this has left me to a breaking point.

Jazakallah

?SUhail2345


Tagged as: abandoned, abortion, affair, betrayal, depression, Divorce, Family, haraam relationship, Marriage, Pregnancy, Premarital relationship, Zinaa

Source: http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/walked_out_on_me_whilst_pregnant/

gi joe

Willia's Site - Multiply - cartier foxtrot

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?Therefore, from 12 channels is no longer any difference if the receiver have forgotten to have turned up your phone?s volume and thus cannot hear what is being said by a caller. Enjoy wire-free, hands-free listening of music as well as being able iPod Touch, took only 8 seconds to load in the 3rd generation model. These include a slim volume control which is on the left edge, a Home button on 8, 12, 16, 20, 32 or even 54 channels, creating an arms race similar to that existed at the time of the multimedia kits. Consumers willbe very happy by finding such a vast market of it and will enjoy their wide selection of Cell phone accessories, cell tools that are very sophisticated and which can be used with advanced techniques to get any faulty cell phone back up and running once more. Other categories include Western, Comedy, Drama, Anime, sci iPod Touch, many of the accessories for one or the other work on both. Not only this such sites also have mobile accessories of branded companies choice, many prepaid cell phone providers offer options for international use.

Source: http://williawez.multiply.com/journal/item/134/Deciding-Upon-Easy-Methods-For-Parrot-Bluetooth-Accessories

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Source: http://cartier-foxtrot.blogspot.com/2013/03/willia-site-multiply.html

there will be blood

10 Tips For Surviving The Aftermath Of Your ... - Huffington Post

Written by Aunt Becky on CafeMom's blog, The Stir.

After announcing my own impending divorce, I was inundated with sweet and kind emails from people who had been long-time readers of my site.

Many of them offered love and support, a rare bright spot during those dark days.

Still others told me their story: they'd come home from work to find their husband had left... for good. They'd woken up to the words, "I want a divorce."

The problem, they informed me, was that they did not.

Talk about making an already soul-wrenching situation even worse. Here are some tips for coping with a divorce... that you don't want.

1) Remind yourself that you're going to be okay. I know it feels like the air has been sucked out of the room, but it's still there. I promise. Keep "I'm going to be okay" as your mantra for this period.

2) Talk out your feelings with a trusted friend and a therapist. Yes, I said both. Because you're going to need both. Finding out your husband of a zillion years doesn't want you anymore is like the world's biggest failed job interview.

3) Do your best to remember that the "why"s don't matter. In fact, they may make it worse. And I promise you this: they do not fix the situation or allow you closure.

4) Do not ask your soon-to-be ex too much about why he or she is leaving in any vivid detail. An unruly imagination on top of your already broken heart is enough to deal with.

5) Avoid stalking him. I know, you share bank accounts and possibly an email account, but don't make it your goal in life to find out what he's doing. You can't unlearn that sort of thing no matter how hard you try.

6) Remember that you are not a failure. I don't know how low my self-esteem plummeted when the "D" word got brought up in my house, but I'll tell you that it was a very, VERY dark space and time for me.

7) Know that there is a world outside of divorce, I swear. It's a different one, for sure, but it's a world in which you can make your own decisions. There are upsides to divorce.

8) Don't freak out if your emotions range from frantic to rage to hysterical. This is normal. I had a "crying hour" from about 9-10 p.m. each night for months. This is okay.

9) Don't bother trying to "get him (or her) back." No matter how many frilly undergarments you buy, it's over. I'm sorry. I really am.

10) Above all else, remind yourself that you do NOT need to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you. That's the truth, not fiction.

What advice would you give to someone who is getting divorced... but doesn't want to?

More from The Stir:

7 Things You Should Consider Before Getting Back Together With Your Ex

10 Things Every Woman Going Through a Divorce Wants to Hear

Here's How Much a Divorce REALLY Costs

What NOT to Say to Your Spouse If You Want to Stay Married (VIDEO)

?

Follow The Stir on Twitter: www.twitter.com/The_Stir

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Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/the-stir/10-tips-for-surviving-the_b_2767602.html

bob marley

Recovery effort ends for Florida man presumed dead in sinkhole

SEFFNER, Florida (Reuters) - Florida rescue workers have ended their efforts to recover the body of a man who disappeared into a sinkhole that swallowed his bedroom while he slept in a suburban Tampa home, and the house will be demolished, a public safety official said on Saturday.

Jeff Bush, 36, who is presumed dead, was asleep when the other five members of the household who were getting ready for bed on Thursday night heard a loud crash and Jeff screaming.

"Our data has come back, and there is absolutely no way we can do any kind of recovery without endangering lives of workers," said Hillsborough County Fire Rescue spokeswoman Jessica Damico.

She said demolition of the home would begin early on Sunday.

Authorities had not detected any signs of life using listening devices and cameras at the scene.

"There's nothing compatible with life in this situation," Damico said. "There's no way of possible survival."

Jeff Bush's brother, 35-year-old Jeremy Bush, had feared his brother was lost after jumping into the hole and furiously digging in an effort to find him.

"I thank the Lord for not taking my daughter and the rest of my family," Jeremy said on Saturday.

Jeremy himself had to be rescued from the sinkhole by the first responder to the emergency call, Douglas Duvall of the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office. When Duvall entered Jeff Bush's bedroom, all he saw was a widening chasm but no sign of Jeff.

"The hole took the entire bedroom," said Duvall. "You could see the bedframe, the dresser, everything was sinking," he said.

Norman Wicker, 48, the father of Jeremy's fianc?e who also lived in the house, ran to get a flashlight and shovel.

"It sounded like a car ran into the back of the house," Wicker said.

(Additional reporting by Brendan O'Brien and Colleen Jenkins; Editing by Barbara Goldberg and Todd Eastham)

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/florida-man-feared-dead-sinkhole-swallows-him-015434162.html

brad miller

Kerry: Divided Egypt needs political compromise

CAIRO (AP) ? Egypt's bickering government and opposition need to overcome their differences to create "a sense of political and economic viability" if the country is to thrive as a democracy, U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry said Saturday.

He urged them to compromise for the good of the country.

In meetings with Egypt's foreign minister and opposition politicians, some of whom plan to boycott upcoming parliamentary elections, Kerry said an agreement on economic reforms to seal a $4.8 billion International Monetary Fund loan package was critical. Closing the IMF deal also will unlock significant U.S. assistance promised by President Barack Obama last year.

But Kerry's message to the liberal and secular opposition may have been blunted as only six of the 11 guests invited by the U.S. Embassy turned up to see the top American diplomat at a group meeting, and three of those six said they still intended to boycott the April polls, according to participants.

Undaunted, Kerry told reporters he had heard great passion from those who did attend and was convinced that they wanted to work in Egypt's best interests.

But after meeting with Foreign Minister Kamel Amr, he acknowledged the difficulty in overcoming the deep differences. He said he would make that point to President Mohammed Morsi, an Islamist from the Muslim Brotherhood, in their talks Sunday.

"I say with both humility and with a great deal of respect that getting there requires a genuine give-and-take among Egypt's political leaders and civil society groups just as we are continuing to struggle with that in our own country," Kerry told reporters, in apparent reference to the current stalemate in Washington over the federal budget.

'There must be a willingness on all sides to make meaningful compromises on the issues that matter most to all of the Egyptian people."

Kerry spoke by telephone with Mohammed ElBaradei, a Nobel peace laureate who heads the National Salvation Front, an opposition coalition calling for the election boycott.

He also met privately with Amr Moussa, a former minister under ex-President Hosni Mubarak who's now aligned with the Salvation Front. Moussa, an ex-Arab League head, ran for president last summer.

Neither ElBaradei nor Moussa attended the group meeting.

The Salvation Front says now is not the time for elections that will further polarize the country while violent clashes continue between protesters and security forces, further shaking the faltering economy.

Even as Kerry arrived from Turkey on the latest stop in his first official overseas visit as secretary of state, activists in the Nile Delta city of Mansoura said a 35-year-old protester was killed when an armored police vehicle crushed him to death during violent anti-Morsi protests Saturday.

In the restive Suez Canal city of Port Said, a police vehicle ran over five people Saturday after protesters marching along a main street refused to allow the car through.

The continuing political turmoil has scared away tourists and foreign investors, eroding Egypt's foreign reserves by nearly two-thirds of what it was before the uprising. Those reserves, which stand at less than $14 billion, are needed to pay for subsidies that millions of poor Egyptians rely on for survival.

Kerry told business leaders that the U.S. is not picking sides in Egypt, and he appealed to all sides to come together around human rights, freedom and speech and religious tolerance. Equally essential, he said, is uniting to undertake the reforms necessary to qualify for the IMF package. Those include increasing tax collections and curbing energy subsidies.

"It is clear to us that the IMF arrangement needs to be reached and we need to give the market place some confidence," Kerry said.

"It is paramount, essential, urgent that the Egyptian economy gets stronger, gets back on its feet and it's very clear that there is a circle of connections in how that can happen," he said. "To attract capital, to bring money back here, to give business the confidence to move forward, there has to be sense of security, there has to be a sense of political and economic viability."

Opposition politician Mohammed Abu Hamed said Kerry told the six attendees that Egypt must quickly end the turmoil to restore investor confidence and help the country get the loans it needs. But he said he was unmoved by Kerry's unity appeal and suggestion that if the opposition wanted its voice heard it should participate in the elections.

"He is coming with conviction that elections are the solution," Abu Hamed told The Associated Press after the meeting.

"Three of us insisted on our position to boycott elections and explained our opinion," he said. "The other three said they would take part, but that there needs to be guarantees of transparency and fairness in the elections."

One invitee who decided not to attend, Ahmed Maher, the founder of a group that helped spark the revolution that toppled Mubarak, said he didn't go because the meeting's goals were unclear, its allotted time of about an hour was not long enough and it lacked major opposition figures.

"It is clear that nothing has changed in Washington's shallow way of dealing with Egypt," he said. "There are no deep conversations. Everything is just being rushed through." He added that the elections will be a "one-sided game" because the Muslim Brotherhood is running Egypt.

Kerry finished his day with Kamel Amr at the foreign ministry. Before the meeting, several hundred people protested against Kerry's visit. They burned Kerry's pictures and chanted that Washington was siding with the Muslim Brotherhood; they dispersed before Kerry arrived.

The foreign minister said he was hopeful that the Obama administration would come through for Egypt.

"Of course, we expect from friends, especially the United States as a strategic partner, to stand by Egypt in this period, especially on the economic issues," he said.

Kerry is in Cairo on the sixth leg of a nine-nation trip to Europe and the Middle East.

Source: http://news.yahoo.com/kerry-divided-egypt-needs-political-compromise-210412955--politics.html

ibooks author

Thailand's prime minister vows to end ivory trade

Thai activists hold posters urging people to stop the trading of tigers during the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, in Bangkok Sunday, March 3, 2013. How to slow the slaughter and curb the trade in "blood ivory" will be among the most critical issues up for debate at the 177-nation Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, that gets under way Sunday in Bangkok. And the meeting's host, Thailand, will be under particular pressure to take action. (AP Photo/Sakchai Lalit)

Thai activists hold posters urging people to stop the trading of tigers during the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, in Bangkok Sunday, March 3, 2013. How to slow the slaughter and curb the trade in "blood ivory" will be among the most critical issues up for debate at the 177-nation Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, that gets under way Sunday in Bangkok. And the meeting's host, Thailand, will be under particular pressure to take action. (AP Photo/Sakchai Lalit)

Miss Universe 2005 Natalie Glebova of Canada, center, wearing Wonder Woman costume poses with Thai children in elephant and tiger costumes on the occasion of Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, in Bangkok, Thailand Sunday, March 3, 2013. How to slow the slaughter and curb the trade in "blood ivory" will be among the most critical issues up for debate at the 177-nation Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, that gets under way Sunday in Bangkok. And the meeting's host, Thailand, will be under particular pressure to take action. (AP Photo/Sakchai Lalit)

Miss Universe 2005 Natalie Glebova of Canada, wearing Wonder Woman costume poses with Thai children during Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, in Bangkok, Thailand Sunday, March 3, 2013. How to slow the slaughter and curb the trade in "blood ivory" will be among the most critical issues up for debate at the 177-nation Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, that gets under way Sunday in Bangkok. And the meeting's host, Thailand, will be under particular pressure to take action. (AP Photo/Sakchai Lalit)

Thai activists hold signs against illegal wildlife trade during the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, in Bangkok Sunday, March. 3, 2013. How to slow the slaughter and curb the trade in "blood ivory" will be among the most critical issues up for debate at the 177-nation Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, that gets under way Sunday in Bangkok. And the meeting's host, Thailand, will be under particular pressure to take action.(AP Photo/Sakchai Lalit)

BANGKOK (AP) ? Facing the possibility of sanctions, Thailand's prime minister vowed for the first time Sunday to work toward ending her country's trade in ivory. But she gave no timeline for implementing a domestic ban, and conservationists warned that the unprecedented slaughter of elephants in Africa would continue until she does.

Thailand's internal ivory trade is currently legal, but wildlife groups say smuggled African tusks are mixed in with native stocks and that skyrocketing demand here is helping fuel the worst poaching crisis in sub-Saharan African in two decades.

Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra made the pledge during the opening meeting of the 178-nation Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, or CITES, in Bangkok.

She said her government would tighten local controls on Thailand's domestic ivory trade by systematically registering domestic elephants and ivory products. Then, "as a next step, we will work toward amending the national legislation with the goal of putting an end to (the) ivory trade and to be in line with international norms," she said.

However, Theerapat Prayurasiddhi, deputy director of Thailand's department of parks and wildlife, told The Associated Press there were no immediate plans to institute a domestic ban on ivory trading.

He said that could happen "step by step in the future ? maybe," but called it "the long-term goal." For now, the government will focus on boosting measures to tighten domestic trade controls and slow the flow of African ivory from entering Thai markets.

Theerapat said Thai traders had the right to buy or sell ivory obtained legally from domesticated stocks, and that taking those rights away could be tantamount to efforts to ban guns in the United States.

"You cannot change everything overnight," he said. "It's going to take time."

Asked how Thailand's legislation might be amended, Theerapat said there was a push to add African elephants to Thailand's own lists of protected species, a move that would allow law enforcement to impose higher fines and harsher jail terms on smugglers.

Carlos Drews, head of the World Wildlife Fund's delegation to CITES, welcomed Yingluck's pledge but said "the fight to stop wildlife crime and shut down Thailand's ivory markets is not over."

Yingluck "now needs to provide a timeline for this ban and ensure that it takes place as a matter of urgency, because the slaughter of elephants continues," Drews said.

Around 70 years ago, up to 5 million elephants are believed to have roamed sub-Saharan Africa. Today, just several hundred thousand are left. Last year, 32,000 elephants were killed on the continent, according to the Born Free Foundation, which says black-market ivory sells for around $1,300 per pound; much of it ends up as tourist trinkets.

Thailand is one of the world's top destinations for smuggled ivory ? second only to China, according to the wildlife monitoring network TRAFFIC. The group has called for CITES members to impose economic trade sanctions against Thailand, along with Nigeria and Congo, which would halt those nations' ability to trade in all 35,000 species regulated by the convention.

CITES banned the international ivory trade in 1989. But the move never addressed domestic markets like Thailand's, where trading remains legal as long as only ivory from domesticated elephants is involved.

Curbing the trade in "blood ivory" is at the top of the agenda during the global biodiversity conference, which lasts two weeks. Around 70 proposals are on the table, most of which will decide whether member nations increase or lower the level of protection on various species. These include polar bears, rays and sharks that are heavily fished for shark fin soup.

There are proposals, too, to regulate 200 commercially valuable timber species ? half from Madagascar ? and ban their trade unless it can be shown they were harvested legally and sustainably.

Achim Steiner, executive director of the United Nations Environment Program, said up to 90 percent of the world's timber trade is illegal, a business worth at least $30 billion per year.

Illegal wildlife trafficking is also at crisis levels, and the world must clamp down hard to stop it or risk losing some of the planet's most iconic species, like elephants, he said.

"The backdrop against which this meeting takes place should be a very serious wakeup call for all of us," Steiner told some 2,000 delegates assembled at a convention center in the Thai capital.

Wildlife trafficking "in a terrible way has become a trade and a business of enormous proportions ? a billion-dollar trade in wildlife species that is analogous to that of the trade in drugs and arms," Steiner said. "This is not a small matter. It is driven by a conglomerate of crime syndicates across borders."

Prior to the establishment of CITES in 1973, there was no international regulation of the cross-border wildlife trade. CITES officials say their aim is not to outlaw the buying and selling of flora and fauna, but to ensure it remains sustainable as the world's population explodes.

CITES Director-General John Scanlon said the slaughter of African elephants and rhinos was among the group's greatest concerns. He said poachers, rebel militias and mafia-like crime syndicates that smuggle animal parts across borders could wipe the species out.

"This criminal activity poses a serious threat to the stability and economies of these countries. It also robs these countries of their natural heritage, their culture heritage, and it undermines good governance and the rule of law," Scanlon said. "These criminals must be stopped, and we need to prepare to deploy the sorts of techniques that are used to combat the trade in narcotics to do so."

"We know the way. We now need the collective will," Scanlon said. "Right here, right now in Bangkok is when we must come together to turn the tables on serious wildlife crime."

Associated Press

Source: http://hosted2.ap.org/APDEFAULT/cae69a7523db45408eeb2b3a98c0c9c5/Article_2013-03-03-UN-Saving%20Species/id-aa8030c39f1c4974a0aee8fba0a8dae1

Butterball

Google's Zopfli compression algorithm aims to speed up the web

Google's Zopfli compression aims to speed up the web

Google's latest attempt to squeeze data into increasingly smaller and smaller spaces comes with a rather silly sounding name inspired by Swiss bread. Zopfli is a compression algorithm that Mountain View claims can create files between three and eight percent smaller than Zlib. Of course, the trade off is that it requires between two and three times as much CPU time to finish shoving everything into a neat little package. Obviously this isn't an ideal solution for on-the-fly compression. However, decompression speeds are unchanged and don't require a special library to unpack. The most obvious use of the technology will be in the mobile space where static website elements an be compressed once and transferred frequently. That would mean quicker load times, less battery drain and, perhaps most importantly in this era of capped data plans, less bandwidth usage. For a few more details check out the source link.

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Allyson Felix